Worrying (or not) about Rosie

As many of you know, because it is mostly all I talk about, I live with my two golden labradors, Rosie and Iona. We are very close. They sleep on my bed at night. They sit with me - on and off - when I meditate, or watch telly. The hover at the kitchen door, whenever I am cooking. And, as anyone with a labrador will know, if the bathroom door is ever closed, they are not happy about it….enough said. 

Needless to say, I love them very much. 

On Monday, Rosie was spayed. It is quite a serious surgery, although routine, in which the ovaries and some of the uterus are removed under a general anesthetic. My vets (Vets for Pets Bridlington) are wonderful, and looked after Nutmeg and Holly in their last days and have looked after Rosie and Iona, since they were adorable eight week old puppies.

Rosie and Iona won’t be having puppies, although I was tempted, as it is a natural part of life for a female dog. But if I let Rosie have a litter of puppies, I would have to let Iona have a litter of puppies. I would have to let them each keep one of their puppies, and two labradors are enough. Then there would be the responsibility of making sure that each of the puppies had a good home to go to. Rosie and Iona were born in a litter of eight puppies, that is a lot of puppies.

Also, there are health benefits to being spayed, as well as, the girls not having to go through the hormonal upheaval and discomfort of regular seasons. 

My attitude was that, having made the decision to have Rosie spayed, I would not worry about it, as I had no control over whatever might happen (not that we have control of what is going to happen anyway). 

This worked for me pretty well. I asked my lovely neighbour to take Iona for a walk while I dropped Rosie off at the vets, as the girls have never been apart before and I didn’t wany Iona to be on her own. I spoke to the very nice and reassuring vet about the procedure. He said someone would ring me once Rosie had come round from the surgery and that I should be able to pick her up at around 4pm. 

I came home and worked, designing some new products, more to come about this soon!

So I was pretty distracted, actually engrossed, and not particularly worried. Then when it got to 3pm and I was expecting a call, and none came, my mind began to imagine. My neighbour texted to see if I had heard anything. 

Watching my mind was amazing, it was telling me stories about all that might have gone wrong. Had Rosie not woken up from the anaesthetic, had the operation gone wrong, what would it be like to just have Iona? When I realised I was doing this, I grounded and reassured myself, that all was most likely well. I took some control by agreeing with myself to ring the vets at 4pm, if I hadn’t heard from them and carried on.

The worry was still on my mind for that hour and although I was able to not get caught up in the worry stories, I felt the flighty feeling of worry in my body and noticed worry thoughts passing through my mind. I continued to stay busy, but with hindsight I wonder if I might have done a RAIN practice around the worry. 

Totally natural to be worried in these circumstances…..nothing wrong. 

By training the mind in mindfulness, it is possible to see what the mind is doing and have a choice not to follow its natural inclination, be it towards, worry, anger, sadness, resentment, etc. It takes the suffering out of life caused by the mind’s elaborations, although we do have to feel and allow the authentic pain of the underlying feelings. As Rob Nairn said the suffering adds 90%, and a trained mind can live just the 10% authentic pain. Yes please!

The call came just after 4pm and all was well. My neighbour came for Iona again and I went to pick Rosie up. She was fine, although completely out of it. The veterinary nurse who spoke to me was obviously smitten with my Rosie (a little bit proud of this, to be honest). Rosie had been very calm and loving, she had been snuggling up and resting her head on the nurses looking after her, which is typical Rosie, and totally adorable, even if I am a bit biased. 

Rosie slept yesterday evening and last night. This morning she ate some breakfast and is sleeping now. You can see her in her lovely zebra print (the vet’s choice not mine) body suit, which stops her, and particularly Iona (who is very interested) in getting to the wound and licking it. 

Iona’s turn in August, but at least I will know not to expect a call from the vets until 4pm.